Since I accepted the new work of the Almighty God, God’s word had made me understand many truths that I did not understand before. Less than four months later, I began to perform my duty. Being with the brothers and sisters every day, I felt it was very meaningful to live such a life.
Once in performing my duty, a sister told me, “Actually you were not qualified to be preached to. Because you believed in Jesus only for a short time and did not attend meetings, and what’s more, the Sending sect is a group controlled by evil spirits, you shouldn’t have been preached to. It was only because your aunt always mentioned you that you had been preached to.” On those words, my face seemed to be burning immediately. But with a forced smile, I said, “Oh, I didn’t know that. Then which sect is good?” The sister answered, “The Three Grades of Servants Church. The brothers and sisters from this sect could endure hardships and have a good foundation” (Later I learned that it was only an incorrect opinion of her own; but she could say that to me and this was a circumstance God set for me.) After I returned home, my heart felt very bad, all kinds of feelings welling up. I felt I would have no face to meet the brothers and sisters, and I even complained against God in my heart, “Why did I belong to the Sending sect? If only I had been in The Three Grades of Servants Church! What opinions will the brothers and sisters have of me? Since I was known to be unfit to be preached to, why did you still preach to me?” During that period, I always had the feeling that others all came from “eminent families” and were “children of high-ranking cadres,” while I was a “child from a poor family,” without status or reputation. From then on, my spirit began to sink. The several months’ rushing about never tired me, but now I lost all my strength. Once, when I ate and drank the word of God, I read these words: “Now some people have misgivings because of their status. Because they have a low status and a low position, they do not want to pursue to be perfected. At first I spoke about being perfected, and later I spoke about the descendants of Moab, so you denied the path of being perfected, which I spoke about before. … Your stature is so small that you cannot withstand a small stir. When you see that you have too low a standing, you become passive and have no faith to pursue. People only take receiving grace and enjoying peace as the mark of believing in God, and they take pursuing to receive blessings as the fundamental purpose of believing in God. Few people pursue to know God and pursue to be transformed in their nature.” (From “Give Up the Blessing of Status and Understand God’s Intention of Saving Man”) After I read these words, my heart was enlightened. I felt bad because I had not dropped my position or seen through my status. Even if the sister had not said that to me, usedn’t I to believe in the Lord in the Sending sect? Wouldn’t I still be a descendant of Moab? Even if I had joined the Three Grades of Servants Church, wouldn’t my identity still be the offspring of the great red dragon? I’m now a descendant of Moab and was born in the land where the great red dragon is entrenched, and I was from the Sending sect and had believed in Jesus only for a short time, without much knowledge of the Bible; but God has still saved me. Doesn’t this show that God loves me even more? I am so disobedient, blind, and foolish and a person who doesn’t know God, yet I can receive God’s salvation. Doesn’t this show that God’s love is great and real? As to where I was born and in which sect I believed in the Lord, wasn’t all this ordained by God? In view of my origin—a descendant of Moab, who was cursed, I was unworthy to live in God’s family. But today God still does the salvation work on me. Doesn’t this even more prove that God’s grace is very great? Now I understand that everything is arranged and ordained by God; I am not entitled to choose my origin, even less qualified to ask God to change my all according to my will. I should thereby see that God’s salvation and blessing have come to me, a person of low status, and I should even double my effort to repay God’s love.
From then on, when someone mentioned again that I was from the Sending sect, I no longer felt embarrassed but proud, for God has uplifted and graced me.
Fengcheng City, Liaoning Province