One day, I met the newly-transferred leader in a host home, and she asked me how the work in our church was going in that period and whether a certain gospel friend to whom we preached had accepted the gospel. I clearly knew then that the gospel friend had not accepted it, but for the sake of preserving my face and position and leaving on the new leader a good impression, I replied quickly, “He has, and he’s doing well.” Having said this, I thought to myself, “The leader has just been transferred here and doesn’t know much about the situation in our place. This matter can hardly come to light.” A few days later, the leader mentioned this matter again on the phone, and again I fobbed her off. Soon after that, unexpectedly, she came to me and inquired about the details of the matter. Faced with her specific inquiries, I blushed and felt a thrill of flusteration, “This time I really cannot wrap fire in paper. What should I do?” Suddenly, I had a “brainwave”: Yes! Never confess, and continue my deception. When I was about to use this “clever trick” to deal with the leader, however, I felt sharply rebuked in my heart.
Right then, God’s words resounded in my ears: “And why do you not take this opportunity to ‘sever’ your tongue that speaks unrighteous words? Are you willing to suffer the fire of hell for your hands and tongue and lips? My eyes search the hearts of all men, because I had had man’s heart in my control and searched man’s heart before I created mankind. How can the thoughts in man’s heart escape my eyes? And how can they have the time to shun the burning of my Spirit?” Instantly, I seemed to see God, righteous and holy, majestic and wrathful, standing before me, looking at my every action and listening to my every word. I trembled with fear and sweated coldly all over. I hurried to another room and repented to God: “O Almighty God, I am too crafty and too contemptible! For achieving my own purpose, I lied about the fact and deceived you knowingly. I, the offspring of vipers, am really unworthy to live before you. You gave the commission to me in order that I can care for your burden, gain the truth from you, and fulfill my duty in a down-to-earth manner. But I did not understand your kind intention and had no fear of you. For the sake of preserving my face and position, I played tricks and practiced deception again and again. According to my doings, I deserve only to receive your curse and punishment. Yet, you have not treated me according to my transgressions but inspired and guided me by your words and given me the opportunity to examine myself. O God, I am willing to repent and reform myself….” After the prayer, I told the leader the whole truth, baring my ugly behavior of practicing deception repeatedly.
At that moment, my face was burning, but I felt very relieved and assured in my heart. Thank God that his timely chastisement and judgment “severed” my viperous tongue. Otherwise, I would have followed my crafty inherent nature and continued my deception and thus offended God’s nature. In this experience, I have realized that God’s nature is righteous and holy and does not allow any filthiness to exist, and that God’s chastisement and judgment expresses his majesty. From now on, I will have a heart of fearing God, accept the searching of God’s Spirit in everything, be an honest person, and perform my duty properly to comfort God’s heart.
Changzhi City, Shanxi Province