One day in this September, when I was making a phone call in the street, my husband, whom I hadn’t seen for more than one year, suddenly appeared before me and forced me to go home with him. As soon as I entered the gate of the house, my daughter ran over and put her arms around me, saying, “Mom, where have you been? I miss you very much. You will not leave us from now on, will you? …” Her words made me feel gusts of sourness in my heart. My husband told me of his difficulties in the more than one year, and tried to persuade me not to run around anymore but to live dutifully at home. He also said he would buy me whatever I wanted…. My parents-in-law echoed his words. Listening to their words and looking at the house with all the necessary things to eat and use, I could not help waving in my heart, and my resolution made before God was already cast behind me. I thought: How nice it is to enjoy family happiness at home. Why should I suffer abroad? Moreover, I will be criticized if I achieve no results in the work…. When I was perplexed, the hymn of God’s word “Pursue a Meaningful Life” arose in my mind: “You have to have a real love, and have to make every effort to break free from such a fallen life and break free from such a carefree animal life. Do not play with your life as a toy. … Do not fool yourself; do not befool yourself. After your life glides away unknowingly, will you still have such an opportunity to love God? Is it possible for man to love God after death? You have to have Peter’s will and conscience and have to live with meaning. Do not toy with yourself!” Every word of the hymn struck my heart, and made me realize this: I cannot give up my pursuit of the truth for satisfying my fleshly ease. Would that not be falling into the trap of satan? Today, God has given me the chance to perform my duty to repay God’s love, and I can’t give up my duty at this crucial time. If I miss this chance, I will regret to death. Having thought of this, I made up my mind to choose to satisfy God.
On the next morning, looking at my slumbering husband and child and thinking of the family’s pressing me to stay, I felt distressed and hesitated. Just then God’s words inspired me once again: “You, who are a created being, should worship God and pursue a meaningful life. If you don’t worship God, living in the filthy flesh, won’t you become a beast in human attire? Since you are a human, you ought to expend for God and endure all sufferings! As for the few sufferings you are undergoing now, you ought to accept them glad and assured in your heart, and try to live out a meaningful life….” God’s words aroused my sleeping heart. I can’t live like a beast. God created me in order for me to perform the duty of a created being and worship God, not for me to crave fleshly ease on earth. If I do this, I will hurt God’s heart too much. O God! Thank you for arranging such a circumstance to refine me, so that I can have the opportunity to undergo sufferings and bear a testimony for you. I am willing to endure the sufferings and give up what I love. I am willing to lay aside my harmonious family to expend for you and pursue to live out a meaningful life. I will be worthy of your salvation for me through your incarnation, and will be worthy of the painstaking care and the price you have expended for me. Under the encouragement of God’s words, I resolutely went out of the house and again threw myself into performing my duty.
Dalian City, Liaoning Province