I Am Not a Person Who Can Truly Accept the Truth
Previously, I had always considered myself to be a person who could accept the truth, because every time the leader pointed out to me my defect and deficiency, I could accept them “humbly,” and I often warned myself that I could not make the same error for a second time. However, exposed by a fact, I saw that I am not a person who can truly accept the truth.
Once, when I was fellowshipping together with a sister, a co-worker of mine, she said to me, “I’ve found that you have quite a good knowledge, but you’re too weak and always complain about the difficulties when encountering things. If you bring your knowledge into your real life and make a further effort to cooperate, the result of your gospel work will surely go up.” When I heard these words, I was very unhappy. And I felt very resentful of her in my heart: What qualifications do you have to teach me! The result of your gospel work is not good either. You can’t even manage your own business, but you worry about mine…. So, I stiffly said, “H’m,” and no longer wanted to speak with her. At that time, I did not have a bit of knowledge of such an expression of mine.
One day, in The Manual of the Principles for the Church Work, I read these words: “A person who can accept the truth can surely accept pruning and dealing, can accept anyone’s advice and help, and can accept anyone’s fellowship in conformity with the truth. Therefore, only those who can accept the truth are the ones who can truly obey God and obey the truth. A person who cannot accept the truth certainly has too many notions about God, and certainly has many disagreements and dissatisfactions with men. He will never listen to a word of the ordinary people….”
Reading these words, I could not help recalling what I expressed that day when the sister pointed out my defect to me. Immediately, my face began to burn. I had always thought myself to be a person who could accept the truth. But when the sister pointed out my defect, I not only did not listen, but I was very resentful and thought that she was poking her nose into my business. Does this mean I am a person who can accept the truth? In the past, when the leader pointed out to me my defects and deficiencies, I could repeatedly nod and say yes and could accept them; wasn’t that merely because he was my leader and his position was higher than mine? When the sister, my co-worker, showed me my defect, I disagreed and was dissatisfied, resenting her inwardly, and even found fault with her in return; wasn’t this simply because her position was equal to mine? Weren’t my disagreement and resentment a mark of my not loving the truth and not being able to accept the truth? As for a person who can truly accept the truth, no matter who points out his defects, so long as the words are in accordance with the truth and are beneficial to his life entering, he can accept them humbly and bring them into the reality to practice. I, however, considered position and seniority before I accepted the truth, as if only people of high position were worthy to show me my defects and people of low position were unqualified to do so. I was really too arrogant and self-right!
O God! In your exposing, I have seen that I am by nature too arrogant and do not love the truth. From now on, I will drop myself. No matter which one of the brothers and sisters points out to me my defect, I will accept it with a humble heart. I will pursue to be a person who can truly accept the truth and whose nature is transformed.
Heze City, Shandong Province