I Was an Addlehead Unable to Tell Good from Evil
My father is by nature a very arrogant person. In 1998, he and I accepted God’s end-time work together, but soon after, because he professed that he “came down from heaven and was not of earth,” he was expelled by God’s family. Not long ago, my father suddenly got a serious illness and the doctor diagnosed it as esophageal cancer. I could hardly believe it was true. I thought to myself, “It’s not easy for father to have brought up my brother, sister, and me, enduring all kinds of hardships for so many years. Now, he has gotten this fatal illness. I can’t just sit here and watch him die.” So, I said to my brother and sister, “It is an ancient maxim that children are reared to be a support in old age. It’s right and proper for children to show filial piety to their parents. Today father is ill; we must let him receive treatment. It is worthwhile even if it can prolong his life by one day.”
For father to be treated, we rented a room for him in the vicinity of the hospital. Fearing that he might feel lonely during the treatment, I bought a TV set and a CD player for him. Besides, I tried to buy him good things to eat, and every time the doctor prescribed some kind of medicine, I went to buy at once, and to buy the best of that kind. Thus, I, who had not been well off, lived in more and more straitened circumstances. Nevertheless, I still resolved that I would try my best to let father receive treatment, even if I had to surrender my last resource.
One afternoon, my family sister (my wife) said to me, “Do you know why father has gotten the illness? He claimed that he would leave the earth and ascend to heaven in this August. Isn’t he obviously a false christ? It is God’s righteous nature coming upon him that father has gotten this illness. Why do we harden our neck and act against God?” Then she opened the book of God’s word and showed me these words: “Today, you still can have dealings with these devils and practice conscience and love with these devils. Aren’t you showing kindness to satans? Aren’t you wallowing in the mire with devils? Having followed until today, if people still do not know good and evil and still practice love and compassion blindly and do not have any intention to seek God’s heart and cannot at all have God’s heart as their heart, the end of such people will be more tragic. All those who do not believe in the God in the flesh are God’s enemies. You can practice conscience and love with enemies. Do you have any sense of justice? You are compatible with those I hate and oppose and still practice love or favoritism with them. Aren’t you disobeying? Aren’t you deliberately resisting? Do such people have the truth? They practice conscience with enemies and even practice love with devils and practice compassion with satans. Aren’t they all the ones who deliberately frustrate the work?” Reading here, I suddenly awakened. I hated myself for being so blind and ignorant that I had followed God until today but did not have any discernment. God says that all those who do not believe he is incarnated are his enemies. Such a person as my father who talked wildly and professed to be God is exactly a satan, a devil that has been exposed in God’s end-time work; he deserves to be cursed by God and is one to be destroyed by God. It is God’s righteous nature coming upon him that he suffers from the illness today. And it is the end he deserves. However, I treated him according to conscience and with filial piety. Because of “affection” and in order for him to live for one more day, I was willing to surrender my last resource and be reduced to poverty and ruin. I even thought it right and proper to show filial piety to him. I was really an addlehead who could not tell good from evil. God hates and curses him, but I treated him with love and with personal affection. I was an accomplice who went along with satan in resisting God. O God! Through your exposing, I have seen that though I have believed in you for years, my viewpoint on things still remains unchanged and I am still bound by the satanic philosophy. I stuck to the satanic viewpoint and kept in mind the “love and care” of my parents. Actually, my life comes from you, and it is all owing to your grace and supply that I can live until today. However, I ascribed all this to the evil one that is an enemy of you. I was really addleheaded and disobedient to the extreme. O God! Thank you for the inspiration and guidance of your words, which has made me gain discernment and understand that anyone who is not with you is against you. From now on, I will stand on the side of the truth, love what you love, and hate what you hate, no longer acting by my fleshly emotion. I will resolutely curse my devilish father and cease to be an addlehead who is unable to tell good from evil.
Fuyang City, Anhui Province