I Was Really Regretful
At a meeting in 1999, the leader said in his fellowship, “God’s work will end this year….” After hearing it, the brothers and sisters were filled with confidence, and they dropped their families and careers, gave up all their fleshly pursuits, and performed their duties with great enthusiasm. But I held doubts in my heart, thinking that God’s work would not end so early. Thus, I continued to lead a life of “neglecting neither believing in God nor making money.” When the year of 2000 came, God’s work really did not end as people imagined. Those brothers and sisters who sincerely believed God’s work would end in 1999 and gave up their everything, were refined half dead because there was still a “seven-year trial.” But I was secretly happy in my heart: It was I who was cleverer. I’ve earned money as well as have kept my belief in God. I was not so foolish as you, who made yourselves so awkward. At that time I did not believe that God’s work would end so soon, but you all said that I did not believe God’s word and did not pursue the truth. Now you have all seen what I said was right. So I was indescribably smug.
Later, we had a meeting together, and fellowshipped about what truths we had gained in the “seven-year trial.” The brothers and sisters each talked about their own experiences and knowledge, saying that although they had undergone the suffering of refining, they had gained knowledge of God’s work, and also gained knowledge of their own intents and the mixtures in their belief in God, and that the “seven-year trial” was really of a great benefit to people…. At the time I, however, became an “onlooker,” sitting there blank and staring tongue-tied, unable to talk about any knowledge. Seeing me like that, the brothers and sisters read God’s words to me: “Those who didn’t believe God’s words and those who didn’t pay attention to God’s words had not been refined in the times of chastisement, and consequently, the Holy Spirit did not accompany them and they gained nothing. As for those who had entered the times of chastisement, though they had been refined, the Holy Spirit hiddenly worked in them and thus their life nature had been transformed. Some people looked very active outwardly and were very happy all day, but they had not entered into the state of being refined by the word of God and had not gained any transformation. That is the consequence of not believing the word of God. If you do not believe the word of God, the Holy Spirit will not work on you. God appears to all those who believe his word. Those who believe and receive the word of God can gain the love of God!” It is so. Because I did not believe the work of God, I had not entered into the “seven-year trial” and had not undergone the suffering of refining. Outwardly I looked very happy all day, but I had lost the chance to gain the truth and my life nature had not been transformed. As for those brothers and sisters who believed God’s word and actively performed their duties, though they had undergone much refining due to their abandoning and expending, they have gained the truths and had some knowledge of God, and can fellowship about God’s words in light of their own states. What they have gained is much more, more precious, and more valuable than what they have lost. I felt extremely regretful to see these. Previously I sneered at the brothers and sisters, thinking that they were foolish. Now I see that I myself am the most foolish person. It is truly that the clever are harmed by their cleverness!
Later, I read these words of God: “No matter what God says, you simply enter into his words. When God says he starts chastising people, you just accept the chastisement; when God asks people to die, you just accept the trial. You always live in the newest words of God, and in the end God’s word will make you perfect.” I understood this: If one wants to gain the truth and pursue the transformation of his nature, he has to fully believe God’s word, enter into the present words of God, and always live in the newest words of God; only thus will he be finally perfected by God. O God! Whatever you say or do in the future, I will drop my notions and imaginations, fully believe your words, and enter into the reality of your words. I will never again lose any opportunity to gain the truth and be perfected.
Tianmen City, Hubei Province