I’ve Understood How I Should Know God
At a meeting, I read these words in the fellowship from above: “If Jesus really took a wife and begot a child, was it wrong? His taking a wife and begetting a child didn’t conflict with completing his mission, nor would it affect God’s work. Why do people judge and condemn it? It can be seen that mankind is too unreasonable. …” When I read this, I was shocked, and my mind was like a rough sea: Jesus took a wife and begot a child? Was this possible? It is too unimaginable! How could God take a wife and beget a child? Hasn’t God’s word said: Then let me ask you, ‘Does God have a wife? Can God have a husband? Can God have children?’ Aren’t these fallacies?” God said clearly that he wouldn’t get married or build a career when he came to the earth. But how come the above says this today? Could it be that I have misbelieved? The suspicions clouded my mind and puzzled me despite my much thinking.
Having no choice, I forced myself to read on: “I see that most people’s knowledge of these two matters is of doctrine and regulation, and only a few have gained a little true knowledge. Most people are not at all speaking their knowledge! They are just, by their imaginations, judging God, commenting on God, and limiting God! It seems that if God really did that God would not be God, and if God did things beyond their imaginations God would not be God, and if God did things against their notions God would not be God. They seem to be wrestling with God. If God really did so, they would not acknowledge that he is God! What they really mean is that they do not believe anymore. As you see, doesn’t such a viewpoint judge God, limit God, and deny God? They simply have no reason or submission at all. Is this a true knowledge of God? It is completely people’s arrogant expression and really out of their nature of resisting God.” After I read these words, my heart gradually calmed down. I pondered over this matter carefully. Yes, God is God. He may do whatever he wants. A created being is not entitled to comment on God or limit God at all! Isn’t he too unreasonable? Just like this, outwardly I reluctantly accepted this matter, but inwardly I still could not put it down or accept it despite many thoughts, and I did not understand the purpose of this fellowship from above.
One day, I read these words of God: “Since he is God’s incarnated flesh, he has God’s substance. Since he is God’s incarnated flesh, he has God’s expression. Since God is incarnated, he will bring the work he wants to do. Since he is God’s incarnated flesh, he will express what God is. Since he is God’s incarnated flesh, he can bring man the truth, bestow to man the life, and show man the way. If a flesh does not have God’s substance, he is certainly not the incarnated God. This point is beyond doubt. If people want to investigate whether he is God’s incarnated flesh, they have to ascertain that from the nature and the word he expresses. In other words, to ascertain whether he is God’s incarnated flesh or ascertain whether it is the true way, people must discern from his substance. So, whether he is God’s incarnated flesh mainly hinges on his substance (his work, word, nature, and more other aspects), not on his appearance. If people overlook his substance because of investigating his appearance, it is their foolishness and ignorance. Appearance cannot determine substance. Furthermore, all the works God does cannot be in accordance with man’s notions. Wasn’t Jesus’ appearance an appearance not in accordance with man’s notions? Weren’t his appearance and dressing unable to show his true identity? Wasn’t the reason why the Pharisees of that time resisted Jesus that they only looked at Jesus’ appearance but did not carefully receive the words of Jesus’ mouth?”
After reading these words, I realized that whether a flesh is the incarnated flesh of God is judged not from his appearance, but from whether he has the substance of God, and mainly from such aspects as his work, his word, his expressed nature, and so on. The incarnated flesh of God is the embodiment of the Spirit of God. No matter how his appearance or doings are against man’s notions and imaginations, all that he does is the expression of the truth and is positive things. Even if he takes a wife and begets a child, he is still the holy God Godself, and his substance will not change. One with the substance of man can not become God. Even if he doesn’t take a wife or beget a child during his whole life, he is still a filthy and evil devil and satan, and can never be called God. To the same thing, even if outwardly what God does is the same as what man does, it is different in essence and is still from God’s substance, God’s nature, and God’s wisdom, and it is the truth. The Pharisees of that time only looked at Jesus’ appearance—common-looking and no different from ordinary people in dressing, and moreover, being born of man and living with sinners all the time, but they did not look at Jesus’ substance, so that they nailed Jesus onto the cross and committed a heinous sin. All this was caused by their knowing God and measuring God from his appearance. Today, judging from my inner reaction, I am really no different from the Pharisees of that time. I believed in God in my thinking and notions all along, accepting and obeying what conform to my notions, and disobeying and denying what was beyond my notions. Although at ordinary times I ate and drank a lot of God’s word, I did not gain the true understanding or the real knowledge; I accepted God’s word as dead regulations and letters, and I still judged a matter right or wrong by my fleshly notions; I did not have any truth. God’s wisdom is higher than the heavens, and God’s thoughts are higher than man’s thoughts. How can man fathom God? By what can I require God and limit God? I am really too arrogant and too unreasonable! Besides, the fellowship from above is for us to, through this matter, understand how to know God and discern the substance of things through their appearance; it is not for us to find out whether or not Jesus actually took a wife and begot a child. However, I did the opposite: I only investigated the outward appearance of the matter but neglected its substance, never trying to understand the purpose of the fellowship from above. This shows that my understanding of the truth is too erroneous and absurd!
Thank God! This fellowship from above has exposed my arrogance, foolishness, and ignorance. I see that although I have believed in God for years, I am actually so poor and pitiful that I have no knowledge of God’s substance and may still condemn God, reject God, forsake God, and depart from the true way at any time. I see that I am really in a very dangerous state. At the same time, I have known how I should know God. From now on, I will put efforts on the truths of knowing God. No matter what God does, I will first firmly believe that God is the truth and deny myself, drop my notions to seek the truth, and pursue to be one who has reason, who obeys God, and who has knowledge of God.
Huadian City, Jilin Province