218 Transformed by Judgment
1 I believed in the Lord for years, always yearning for the Lord’s rewards and to enter the kingdom of heaven. I said I loved God, but when trials befell, my heart harbored misunderstandings and complaints. For the sake of reputation and status, I often justified myself and professed innocence, and did not accept the truth. Arguing with God, I said many rebellious things. By undergoing judgment before the seat of Christ, I came to know myself. God’s words were like a sharp two-edged sword that cut open my heart and spirit. God’s stern judgment laid bare the truth of my hypocrisy. I rushed and bustled about for myself to receive blessings, but I said I suffered for my love of God. I was insincere, and everything I did was to deceive and fool God. I believed in God yet made bargains with God—I was completely without conscience or reason. I grievously hurt God and simply lost my humanity, and I was filled with remorse. With no place to hide my shame, I fell before God and was willing to accept God’s judgment.
2 Trials and refinement purify the impurities in my faith in God. God’s words of judgment dispel my notions and imaginings. Only now do I realize that judgment and trials are God’s blessings. Understanding the painstaking intentions of God, I’m determined to pursue the truth. God suffers the utmost humiliation and pain in order to save mankind. He endures man’s misunderstandings and complaints, and waits quietly for man to awaken. God’s judgment and chastisement are only so that mankind can gain truth and life. God’s love is so real—how could we not give thanks and praise? I’m willing to offer up my heart and body to proclaim and testify to God to repay His love. I’ll remember well God’s exhortations and perform my duty faithfully to satisfy God. I’ll be considerate of God’s will and will bear beautiful and resounding testimony for Him. Though the road is rough and rugged, I wish to love God forever.