224 Determined to Faithfully Satisfy God
1 I see the day God gains glory drawing near. Remembering the past, I am filled with remorse. I was so rebellious in my interactions with God, and am left with unbearable memories. I hate myself for coming to my senses so late, feeling guilty for failing to repay His love. Nothing I did conformed to God’s will, so how could I feel joyous and at peace? God became flesh to work in the world, living among humans and sharing their suffering. To be able to love God is so meaningful; I just hate myself for having no conscience or reason. Having failed to love Him sincerely, I feel so indebted to God.
2 I enjoy so much of God’s love, and my heart yearns to repay Him soon. However, my nature rebels and I don’t practice the truth, and have missed many chances to be perfected. I’m left with only remorse and regret, making me detest and loathe myself even more. Seeing that I have no reality of the truth, and that I am still so slipshod in my duty, I feel anxious and weep bitter tears, feeling profoundly unable to face God. Through a careful counting of God’s grace, I see how good and lovable He is. God pays such a high price to bring me salvation, so why can’t I repay His love? Though I haven’t completely cast off my corruption, I will do my best to pursue the truth. On the last leg of the path, I wish to faithfully satisfy God.