By Maude, USA

I was born into an ordinary rural family; my dad would be out working all year round, and he’d rarely come home. My mom raised both my sister and me all alone, and though we weren’t rich, my mom always did her best to give us a good life, and she’d do her best to get me the things I wanted. I was weak and sickly as a child, and I’d often have colds and fevers. Plus, I grew quickly, so my knees often hurt. My family was hard up, and we were generally reluctant to spend on meat, but my mom still often made me pork rib soup, as she was afraid a lack of nutrition might affect my growth. Whenever I was sick, my mom would take care of me without rest. Sometimes I’d have high fevers that wouldn’t go down, and my mom worried a lot, so at night, she’d keep wiping my body with alcohol to bring my temperature down. Not only did she care for me attentively, but she also did her best to honor my grandparents. Every time she took me to my grandma’s house, she would buy things she was normally reluctant to buy, like fruits, milk, or desserts, and she’d often tell me to treat my grandparents well. Sometimes when she heard of a child not honoring their parents, she would call them an ingrate, and say that their parents had raised them in vain. Unknowingly, through my mom’s teachings and actions, I came to believe that honoring parents was what made a good person, that only then could you hold your head high and earn praise, and that if you’re unfilial, people will criticize your lack of conscience behind your back, and you won’t be able to hold your head high. When I was 14, my father tragically passed away in a car accident. I began to cherish the time with my mom even more, and I resolved to myself that when I grew up, I would do everything I could to give my mom a good life, and that I’d care for her as meticulously as she’d cared for me as a child, allowing her to be happy in her old age. I felt that if I couldn’t do this, then I’d be lacking in conscience, and that I wouldn’t even deserve to be called a person.

In 2011, I was fortunate enough to accept God’s work in the last days. In 2012, I was arrested by the police while preaching the gospel. After being released, since it wasn’t safe at home, I had to go elsewhere to do my duty. Over the following years I couldn’t be by my mom’s side, and I always hoped that one day I could reunite with her, take care of her, and honor her. Around March 2023, I suddenly received a letter from my sister, saying that two years earlier, my mom had had a sudden cerebral hemorrhage and cerebral infarction, and that since then, she’d been bedridden with paralysis and unable to care for herself. She also suffered from severe diabetes, and already developed diabetic foot, causing ulceration of the skin and flesh on her toes. Her condition had recently worsened, and she might not have much time left, so my sister hoped I could return home soon to see my mom one last time. Having read the letter, I felt like the sky had fallen in on me. I just couldn’t believe it. I was unable to control my emotions, and I broke down in tears, thinking, “How could this happen to my mom? Is this real? During these last few years I’ve been away from home, I always hoped that one day I could reunite with my mom, take care of her, honor her, and allow her to live her final years happily.” This sudden news was like a bolt from the blue, shattering all of my hopes and expectations. For a while, I couldn’t accept it, and in my heart, I couldn’t help but complain about God, “Why didn’t You let my mom live a few more healthy years?” I even wanted to ask God to shorten my life to extend my mom’s life, just so she could enjoy a few days of quiet happiness. For that, I’d have been fine living a few years less. In the letter from my sister, she also said that my stepfather had proposed divorce just a few days after my mother fell ill, that his attitude toward my mom was terrible, and that he’d been beating and scolding her. My mom was already suffering because of her illness, and she still had to endure the torment from my stepfather every day, so eventually, she developed severe depression. With no other options, my sister had no choice but to agree to let my stepfather divorce my mom. I thought about how my mom needed someone to take care of her for everything. But with my sister having to go to work, my mom was all alone at home. What if she got thirsty or hungry? Who would take care of her? Having come down with such serious illnesses so suddenly, my strong-willed mom must have felt so frustrated and stifled. When she felt down, who’d be there to console and encourage her? The more I thought about it, the more I felt a heart-wrenching pain within me. I wished I could just fly back to my mom’s side right away so I could be with her to talk to her, comfort her, encourage her, and take care of her daily needs. But I’d been arrested by the police before, and if I went back now, I’d surely be walking into a trap. Just going back home to take care of my mom and see her one last time became an unattainable wish of mine. I felt utterly miserable; I just couldn’t muster up any motivation, and I had no heart to do my duties. At night, I couldn’t sleep, and I kept thinking, “I wonder how Mom is doing. Is she resting yet? Or is she still tossing and turning in pain, unable to sleep?” Thinking about it, I couldn’t help but cry, choking on my tears. One night, I even dreamed of my mom, seeing her as her younger self, with two long braids, happily bustling around doing something. I stood not far away, watching her, but no matter how I called to her, she didn’t respond. It seemed like she couldn’t see me or hear my voice. When I woke up, I realized it was just a dream, but the more I thought about it, the sadder I felt, and I couldn’t help but cry bitterly again.

Those days were filled with extreme pain, so I prayed for God to guide me to understand His intention. During that time, a few of God’s words kept coming to my mind: “Every person must accept and face these facts of birth, old age, sickness, and death; this is the law of human existence that God has ordained. Why can’t you accept it? Can you escape it?” I found the passage of God’s words where these phrases came from, and I read it. Almighty God says: “Some people say: ‘I know that I shouldn’t analyze or scrutinize the matter of my parents falling ill or meeting with some great misfortune, that doing so is pointless, and that I should approach this based on the truth principles, but I cannot restrain myself from analyzing and scrutinizing it.’ Restraint is not a way to solve the problem; the key is that you must recognize that being born, aging, falling ill, and dying is a law that God has ordained for people, and that no one can change it. In their lives, people’s bodies begin to show some symptoms of old age when they reach 50 or 60 years old—their muscles and bones aren’t as good any longer, their immunity declines, they don’t sleep well, they easily catch colds, and they don’t have enough energy to read or work. They are struck by various diseases, such as diabetes, arthritis, and also cardiovascular and cerebrovascular diseases like high blood pressure and heart disease. … These physical illnesses will come upon all people. Today it’s them, tomorrow it’s you or us. According to a person’s age, and according to the law and destiny, people will all gradually grow old, their bodies will gradually weaken, and their illnesses will gradually increase until finally they face death—this is the law. It is just that because your parents raised you and they are the people closest to you and who you worry the most about, when you hear the news that your parents have fallen ill, you are unable to get past the hurdle of your affection, and you think, ‘I don’t feel anything when other people’s parents die, but my parents can’t get ill, because that would break my heart and cause me suffering: I just wouldn’t be able to get over it!’ Just because they are your parents, you think that they shouldn’t grow old or get sick, and that they even more so shouldn’t die—does that make sense? This doesn’t make sense, and it is not the truth. Do you understand? (Yes.) Everyone will face the reality of their parents gradually growing old and getting sick—for example, with high blood pressure, heart disease, cerebral hemorrhage, hemiplegia, and so on, as well as various cancers. Therefore, everyone will experience the process of their parents aging, getting sick, and then dying. It is just that the timing of this experience is different for each person, but no matter when these things happen, as a son or daughter, you must accept this fact. If you are an adult, your thinking should be mature, you should have a correct attitude toward people being born, growing old, getting sick, and dying, and you should be able to face it normally. You should not try to avoid it or resist it, or even go so far as to become impulsive and let out words of complaint, complaining about heaven and earth and complaining about God, when you hear that your parents are sick or have died. Every person must accept and face these facts of birth, old age, sickness, and death; this is the law of human existence that God has ordained. Why can’t you accept it? Can you escape it? You want your parents not to get sick or die, you want them to be immortal—does this conform to the law? Is this possible? Have you seen any created being who is immortal? Not a single one. Therefore, you must accept this fact. Before you hear news that your parents are growing old, that they have gotten sick, and died, you should prepare yourself for this in your heart. One day, sooner or later, every person will grow old, they will weaken, and they will die. Since your parents are normal people, why can’t they experience this stage? They should experience this stage, and you should approach it correctly” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (17)). God’s words gradually calmed me down. Birth, aging, illness, and death is the law of life that God has ordained for humanity. With my mom in her 60s, her organs and bodily functions were slowly deteriorating, and it was normal for her body to develop diseases. I shouldn’t argue with God or act unreasonably, trying to exchange years of my own life for my mom’s health and longevity. This is not submitting to God’s sovereignty and arrangements. I am an insignificant created being, and God is the Creator, and I should accept the law of life that God has ordained for humanity, and experience things as they come. I cannot even decide or change the things I experience each day, yet I held the vain hope of changing my mom’s fate. This was truly deluded and unreasonable! However, when I thought about how my mother would pass away soon, I felt truly sad. I cried and prayed to God, “Dear God, I suddenly found out that my mother contracted such a serious disease and may pass away soon, and I can’t accept this in my heart. Please guide me to be able to submit and learn lessons.”

Later, I consciously looked for God’s words related to my state. One day during my devotionals, I read a passage of God’s words. “Whatever illness your parents get, it won’t be because they were so exhausted from raising you, or because they missed you; they especially won’t contract any of those major, serious illnesses or fatal conditions because of you. That is their fate, and it has nothing to do with you. No matter how filial you are or how considerately you care for them, at most you’ll just reduce their physical suffering and burdens a little. But as for when they get sick, what illness they contract, when they die, and where they die—do these things have anything to do with whether or not you’re by their side providing care? No, they don’t. If you’re filial, if you’re not an uncaring ingrate, and you spend all day by their side caring for them, will they not get sick? Will they not die? If they’re going to get sick, won’t they get sick anyway? If they’re going to die, won’t they die anyway? Isn’t that right?” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (17)). From God’s words, I understood that whether parents get sick, how severe the sickness is, or whether they will die, are all predestined and arranged by God, and have nothing to do with their children. Whether children are by their parents’ side or not, the hardships, setbacks and tribulations parents face in life are inevitable, and their children cannot change anything. I thought about my grandfather. His children were all by his side, and he appeared healthy, but when he was about 60, he suffered a severe illness, leaving him bedridden with paralysis, and he fell into a vegetative state, and he needed people to take care of all his bodily functions. My mom, uncle, and aunt all took turns, caring for him day and night, massaging him every day, talking to him, and taking care of him attentively for years, but he never woke up. Now my mother had become seriously ill and was paralyzed in bed. Even if I were to be by her side taking care of her daily needs, it would only make her body a little more comfortable, but I’d be unable to bear the suffering from her illness for her. Whether she recovered or died was something I couldn’t change. Realizing this, I let go of some of my worries about my mother.

However, when I thought about what my sister said to me in her letter, I still felt heartbroken and distressed. My sister said, “‘Crows repay their mothers by feeding them, and lambs kneel to receive milk from their mothers.’ Even animals know to honor their parents. If a human doesn’t even know this, they’re worse than an animal.” I thought about the years I’d been away from home. Such a big thing had happened at home, yet I’d never turned up. I had no idea what our neighbors, relatives, and friends were saying about me, but they’d surely be talking about me behind my back, saying I was unfilial, not even coming home when my mother was seriously ill and nearing death. My mother had raised me since I was little, and this grace was something I could never repay, so I should do my best to provide my mother with the best life, so she didn’t have to worry about food or clothing, and could enjoy a happy, peaceful old age. But now that she was ill, I couldn’t even take care of her. I felt like I was really worse than a beast. Thinking about this felt like a knife in my heart, and I often cried in secret, feeling guilty for not being able to repay my mother’s nurturing grace. Later, I read God’s words: “Let’s look at the matter of your parents giving birth to you. Who was it that chose for them to give birth to you: you or your parents? If you look at this from God’s perspective, this is not for humans to choose. You didn’t choose for your parents to give birth to you, and neither did they. Looking at the root of this matter, this was ordained by God. We’ll put this topic to one side for now, as this matter is easy for people to understand. From your perspective, you were passively born to your parents, without having any choice in the matter. From your parents’ perspective, it was their subjective willingness to have and raise children. In other words, putting aside God’s ordination, when it comes to the matter of having and raising children, it was your parents who had all the power. They chose to give birth to you. You were passively born to them. You didn’t have any choice in the matter. So, since your parents had all the power, and since they gave birth to you, they have an obligation and a responsibility to raise you into an adult. Whether it be providing you with an education, or supplying you with food and clothing, this is their responsibility and obligation, and it is what they ought to do. Whereas you were always passive during the period that they were raising you, you didn’t have the right to choose—you had to be raised by them. Because you were young, you didn’t have the capacity to look after yourself, you had no choice but to be passively brought up by your parents. However your parents raised you, it was not up to you. If they gave you nice food and drinks, then you had nice food and drinks. If your parents provided you with a living environment where you survived off chaff and wild plants, then you survived off chaff and wild plants. In any case, when you were being raised, you were passive, and your parents were fulfilling their responsibility. It’s the same as your parents caring for a flower. Since they want to care for a flower, they should fertilize it, water it, and make sure that it gets sunlight. So, regarding people, no matter whether your parents looked after you meticulously or took great care of you, in any case, they were just fulfilling their responsibility and obligation. Regardless of the reason why they raised you, it was their responsibility—because they gave birth to you, they should take responsibility for you. Based on this, can everything that your parents did for you be considered kindness? It can’t, right? (That’s right.) Your parents fulfilling their responsibility to you doesn’t count as kindness, so if they fulfill their responsibility toward a flower or a plant, watering it and fertilizing it, does that count as kindness? (No.) That is even further from being kindness. Flowers and plants grow better outside—if they’re planted in the ground, with wind, sun, and rainwater, they thrive even more. They don’t grow or turn out as well when they’re planted in a pot indoors as they do outside! Whatever kind of family one is born into, it is ordained by God. You are a person who possesses life, and God takes responsibility for every life, enabling people to survive, and to follow the law that all creatures abide by. It’s just that as a person, you lived in the environment that your parents raised you in, so you should have grown up in that environment. That you were born in that environment is due to God’s ordination; that you were raised into adulthood by your parents is also due to God’s ordination. In any case, by raising you your parents are fulfilling a responsibility and an obligation. Raising you into an adult is their obligation and responsibility, and this cannot be called kindness” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (17)). “There is a saying in the nonbelieving world: ‘Crows repay their mothers by feeding them, and lambs kneel to receive milk from their mothers.’ There’s also this saying: ‘An unfilial person is lower than a beast.’ How grandiose these sayings sound! Actually, the phenomena that the first saying mentions, crows repaying their mothers by feeding them, and lambs kneeling to receive milk from their mothers, really do exist, these are facts. However, they are simply phenomena within the world of living things. They are merely a kind of law that God has established for various living creatures. All kinds of living creatures, including humans, abide by this law, and this further demonstrates that all living creatures are created by God. No living creature can break this law, and no living creature can transcend it. Even relatively ferocious carnivores like lions and tigers nurture their offspring and do not bite them before they reach adulthood. This is an animal instinct. No matter which species they are, whether they are ferocious or kind and gentle, all animals possess this instinct. All kinds of creatures, including humans, can only continue to multiply and survive by abiding by this instinct and this law. If they didn’t abide by this law, or didn’t have this law and this instinct, they wouldn’t be able to multiply and survive. The biological chain wouldn’t exist, and neither would this world. Isn’t that true? (Yes.) Crows repaying their mothers by feeding them, and lambs kneeling to receive milk from their mothers demonstrates precisely that the world of living things abides by this kind of law. All kinds of living creatures have this instinct. Once offspring are born, they are cared for and nurtured by the females or males of the species until they become adults. All kinds of living creatures are able to fulfill their responsibilities and obligations to their offspring, conscientiously and dutifully raising the next generation. This should be even more the case for humans. Humans are called higher animals by mankind—if they cannot abide by this law, and lack this instinct, then humans are worse than animals, aren’t they? Therefore, no matter how much your parents took care of you and how much they fulfilled their responsibility to you while they were raising you, they were only doing what they ought to within the scope of the abilities of a created human—it was their instinct” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (17)).

After I read God’s words, my heart felt a bit brighter. Raising offspring is a natural instinct God has endowed living creatures with; it is a law of life God has established for all living creatures. Both savage beasts and gentle animals follow such laws, and in this way, all kinds of creatures, including humans, can continue to multiply and survive. Since parents choose to bear children, they should take on the responsibility and obligation of raising and caring for them. This is abiding by and conforming to the laws ordained by God; it is the parents’ inherent duty, and should not be treated as a kindness imposed upon their children. “Crows repay their mothers by feeding them, and lambs kneel to receive milk from their mothers” is simply a law set by God for these creatures, an instinctive behavior of creatures. It is not, as people teach, a manifestation of animals being filial to their parents and repaying their kindness. Moreover, on the surface, it appears that parents are taking care of and raising their children, but in reality, in the background it is God who is sovereign over and arranges the fate of each person. I couldn’t help but think back to something my mother once told me. Before I was born, she once had a daughter, who suddenly got ill and passed away at the age of 3. My elder sister, whom I never got to meet, was also cared for by my mother with all her heart. However, she tragically passed away young, while I’ve been able to grow up healthy to this day. Though we shared the same mother, our fates were completely different. This further made me see that human fate is under God’s sovereignty and arrangement, and that parents can only be responsible for raising and caring for their children, but they cannot control or change their children’s fate. I thought of how I’d faced so many difficulties and setbacks in the years since leaving home. There were so many times when I felt I couldn’t go on, and it was God who kept guiding and helping me. I remember a time when my state was really terrible, but God, through the brothers and sisters, patiently fellowshipped the truth with me, helped and supported me, and only then did my numb heart slowly start to awaken, and I began to reflect on myself and turn back to God. God carefully arranged various people, events, and things according to my needs, not only providing for my material needs but moreover taking responsibility for my life. Thinking of God’s love, my heart was really moved. But I’d been influenced and deceived by Satan’s fallacies, attributing everything I had received from God since childhood, to my mother’s efforts, thinking that without my mother’s care, I wouldn’t have become the person who I was. So I wanted to give up my duties to go back home to care for her. This not only affected my own state but also the results of my duty. If it weren’t for the exposure of God’s words, I would still keep believing this mistaken idea, suffering in pain and torment. Realizing this, my heart filled with relief.

Later, I read another passage of God’s words, and I became clearer on how to treat our parents. Almighty God says: “Your parents are not your creditors—that is, you shouldn’t always ponder on how you must repay them just because they’ve spent so long raising you. If you are not able to repay them, if you do not have the opportunity or the conditions to repay them, you’ll always feel sad and guilty, to the extent that you will even feel sad whenever you see someone with their parents, taking care of them and being filial toward them. God ordained that your parents would bring you up, but not so that you would spend your life repaying them. In this life you have responsibilities and obligations that you must fulfill, and a path that you must take; you have your own life. In your life, you should not put all of your energy into being filial toward your parents and repaying their kindness. Being filial to your parents is just one thing that accompanies you in your life. It is something that is unavoidable in human relationships of affection. But as for what kind of connection you and your parents are fated to have and how long you will be able to live together, this depends on God’s orchestrations and arrangements. If God has orchestrated and arranged that you and your parents will be in different places, that you will be very far away from them and unable to live together, then fulfilling this responsibility is, to you, just a kind of longing. If God has arranged for your residence to be very close to your parents, and that you will be able to stay by their side, then fulfilling some responsibilities to your parents and showing them some filial piety are things that you should do—there is nothing that can be criticized about this. But if you are in a different place from your parents, and you do not have the chance or the right circumstances to show them filial piety, then you do not need to regard this as a shameful thing. You should not feel ashamed to face your parents because you are unable to show them filial piety, it is just that your circumstances don’t allow it. As a child, you should understand that your parents are not your creditors. If you only pay heed to repaying your parents’ kindness, this will get in the way of many duties that you ought to do. There are many things that you must do in your life, and these duties that you ought to do are things that a created being should do, and that have been entrusted to you by the Creator, and they have nothing to do with you repaying your parents’ kindness. Showing filial piety to your parents, repaying them, returning their kindness—these things have nothing to do with your mission in life. It can also be said that it is not necessary for you to show filial piety to your parents, to repay them, or to fulfill any of your responsibilities to them. To put it plainly, you can do a bit of this and fulfill a bit of your responsibilities when your circumstances allow; when they do not, you do not need to force yourself to do so. If you cannot fulfill your responsibility to show filial piety to your parents, this is not a terrible mistake, it just goes against your conscience and moral justice somewhat, and you will be censured by some people—that is all. But at the very least, it does not go against the truth. If it is for the sake of doing your duty and following God’s will, then you will even be approved of by God. Therefore, as for being filial to your parents, as long as you understand the truth and understand God’s requirements for people, then even if your conditions do not permit you to be filial to your parents, your conscience will not feel rebuked” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. How to Pursue the Truth (17)). From God’s words, I understood that everyone comes into this world with their own mission, and that being filial to parents and repaying their nurturing grace has nothing to do with one’s mission. If we live with our parents, then caring for and being filial to them to the best of our ability is what we should do. But if the situation doesn’t allow it and we cannot live with our parents, we shouldn’t feel guilty or indebted to them for not being able to take care of them, and we should put our duties first instead. I’d been arrested by the police for preaching the gospel, and I now had a police record. I thought to myself, “If I returned home now, I’d pretty much just be walking into a trap. To say nothing of taking care of my mom, even my personal safety might be at risk.” Given these circumstances, I couldn’t return home, so I should calm my heart and do my duties properly. This is what is most important. As my mom was getting older, sickness and death were a normal part of life. I was unable to take care of her or be filial to her, and though I felt some regret, I was willing to submit to God’s sovereignty and arrangements. God has already ordained everyone’s fate, and birth, aging, sickness, and death are all in God’s hands. No matter how much I worried and fretted for her, even if I accompanied and took care of her, I couldn’t change my mom’s fate. After I understood these, I prayed to God, “God, my mother’s illness is in Your hands, and whether she lives or dies is in Your hands. The number of years she lives has already been predestined by You, and I am willing to entrust my mother into Your hands. No matter the outcome, I am willing to accept and submit to Your orchestrations and arrangements.” After praying, my heart felt much more at ease and liberated, and I no longer worried about this matter. I was able to calm my heart and do my duties. Thank God!